When my children were young, I remember countless conversations with them about honor. Back then, I think my definition of honor had mostly to do with respect. I was very big on respect. Both chidren would attest to that.
Still am, but my definition of honor has widened, and grown. Or else, it has narrowed and gotten more focused.
The desire to be a person of my word is probably one of my greatest personal values. That has never changed, regardless of circumstances, years, people or places. Notice, of course, that I said the desire to be a person of my word. I certainly haven’t always achieved that, but the desire is there, and generally speaking, in most situations, I believe I can be counted on to do what I say I will do.
I so wish that we all agreed on what integrity looks like – if you are fuzzy on that, I know that the Bible is a good place to get clarity on what being a person of honor looks like. And we won’t all agree on that, either, which brings me to the heart of the matter.
How a person chooses to live is not my decision. How I choose to live is my decision. Honor and integrity display themselves in my life in lots of ways, not the least of which when I am hurt or offended, that I try not to return the hurt or offense. That is counter-intuitive behavior, but in my eyes, the way I want to live. I need supernatural strength to live that way, as that is not my natural character. My natural character says hit back, wound , speak louder. My natural self demands. My spiritually in process self doesn’t retaliate. But, that’s not all…
Honor, for me, also is letting my yes be yes, which of course implies letting my no be no It has to do with honoring other’s choices and respecting my own. It means saying what I mean, and meaning exactly what I say. It means holding myself accountable, and giving you the dignity to hold yourself accountable for yourself. I’m pretty busy handling my own stuff. I don’t need to handle yours.
This isn’t a dissertation on honor. It’s just a few bloggy thoughts on living with integrity. How great it is that I’m still in class on this one. Hopefully, you are too.